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Does Not Compute

Sep 29, 2017

Our final two contestants get their heads out of the cloud to compete in this trivia game involving words associated with computing.

Heard On Melissa Joan Hart And Amy Seimetz: Multi Multi-Hyphenates

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OPHIRA EISENBERG, HOST:

It's time to crown our big winner. Let's bring back our finalists, Ayelet Brinn, who studies men who wrote under women's names in Yiddish newspapers, and John DeLamar-Kanter, whose students think Shakespeare's cool when they can look at illustrations of severed heads.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Puzzle guru Greg Pliska, take it away.

GREG PLISKA: John and Ayelet, your final round is called Does Not Compute. Every answer is a word associated with computing. So for example, if I said, stratus, cirrus and cumulonimbus are all types of this, you'd answer cloud. We're playing this round like a penalty shoot-out, which means you'll each get up to eight questions. And the contestant who scores the most points will be our big winner. And your prize tonight will be an ASK ME ANOTHER Rubik's Cube signed by both Melissa Joan Hart and Amy Seimetz. We rolled a 20-sided die, and John is going first. All right. Here we go.

John, the constellation Aries is depicted as this animal. You have three seconds.

(SOUNDBITE OF BUZZER)

PLISKA: No. I'm sorry. John, the answer was RAM.

All right. Ayelet, canned meat product introduced by Hormel in 1937.

AYELET BRINN: Spam?

PLISKA: That is correct.

(SOUNDBITE OF DING)

PLISKA: John, a cicada or aphid.

JOHN DELAMAR-KANTER: Bug.

PLISKA: Correct.

(SOUNDBITE OF DING)

PLISKA: Ayelet, Stuart Little is this type of animal.

BRINN: Mouse.

PLISKA: Correct.

(SOUNDBITE OF DING)

PLISKA: John, at school, a student designated to patrol the halls.

DELAMAR-KANTER: Monitor.

PLISKA: Correct.

(SOUNDBITE OF DING)

PLISKA: Ayelet, in golf, a long club typically used to hit the ball from the tee.

BRINN: Driver? Drive?

PLISKA: Yes, that is correct.

(SOUNDBITE OF DING)

PLISKA: John, the British word for what Americans call a French fry.

DELAMAR-KANTER: Chip.

PLISKA: Correct.

(SOUNDBITE OF DING)

PLISKA: Ayelet, the American word for what the British call a biscuit.

BRINN: Cookie.

PLISKA: Correct.

(SOUNDBITE OF DING)

PLISKA: All right. Now, we're at the halfway point. And Ayelet is in the lead, 4-3. John, here's your next clue. In comics and on the CW, Barry Allen's superhero alter-ego.

DELAMAR-KANTER: Flash.

PLISKA: Correct.

(SOUNDBITE OF DING)

PLISKA: Ayelet, a person who casually looks through books or magazines.

BRINN: Browser?

PLISKA: Correct.

(SOUNDBITE OF DING)

PLISKA: John, an island of Indonesia. It's the most populous island on Earth.

DELAMAR-KANTER: Micro Indonesia?

PLISKA: No, I'm sorry. That's not correct.

(LAUGHTER)

PLISKA: The answer we're looking for is Java.

DELAMAR-KANTER: Ohh.

PLISKA: Ohh.

(LAUGHTER)

PLISKA: Ayelet, gas company with a red and yellow marine mollusk logo.

BRINN: Shell?

PLISKA: That is correct.

(SOUNDBITE OF DING)

PLISKA: John, celebrities and contestants give each other clues to secret words in this game show that premiered in 1961.

DELAMAR-KANTER: "Password."

PLISKA: That is correct.

(SOUNDBITE OF DING)

PLISKA: Ayelet, after killing the Minotaur, Theseus use this object to find his way out of the labyrinth.

BRINN: Compass?

PLISKA: No, I'm sorry. The correct answer we're looking for is string. All right. Here you go, John. A thick structure designed to prevent the spread of flames.

DELAMAR-KANTER: Firewall.

PLISKA: That is correct.

(SOUNDBITE OF DING)

PLISKA: The score is now tied. And this is the last question. Ayelet, if you answer this question correctly, you win. In the Eastern Orthodox Church, it's a traditional work of art often painted on a small piece of wood.

BRINN: Relic? No.

PLISKA: No, I'm sorry. That's not correct. The answer we were looking for there was icon. So we are tied. I have a tie-breaker question. Whoever buzzes in first and answers correctly will win. Here's your clue. An object used to smooth one's fingernails.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

PLISKA: Ayelet.

BRINN: File.

PLISKA: That is correct. Congratulations, Ayelet.

(APPLAUSE)

PLISKA: Well done, John.

EISENBERG: Congratulations, Ayelet. And that's our show. ASK ME ANOTHER'S puzzle guru is Greg Pliska.

PLISKA: Hey, my name anagrams to sparkle gig.

EISENBERG: Our house musician is Jonathan Coulton.

PLISKA: Thou jolt a cannon.

EISENBERG: Our puzzles were written by Matt Foster, Andrew Kane, Danielle Thompson (ph) and senior writer Karen Lurie (ph). Our senior supervising producer is Art Chung. ASK ME ANOTHER'S produced by Mike Katzif, Travis Larchuk, Julia Melfi, Danny Shin, Rommel Wood and our intern Madeline Kaplan, along with Steve Nelson and Anya Grundmann. We are recorded by Damon Whittemore, Rick Kwan and David Hurtgen. ASK ME ANOTHER was created by Eric Nuzum and Jesse Baker. We'd like to think our home in Brooklyn, N.Y., The Bell House...

PLISKA: Hot Heel Blues.

EISENBERG: ...And our production partner WNYC. I'm her ripe begonias.

PLISKA: Ophira Eisenberg.

EISENBERG: And this was ASK ME ANOTHER from NPR.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Support for NPR comes from this station and from the George Gund Foundation, working to make Cleveland and northeast Ohio more globally competitive, livable, sustainable and just. More information available on gundfoundation.org. And the Jack Kent Cooke Foundation, providing scholarships throughout the nation to exceptionally high-achieving students with financial need from middle school to college. Application for high-school seniors is open. More at jkcf.org. This is NPR. Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.